I am in a bit of a bind. My neighbour, the male in the house, is having an affair whilst his wife is away caring for her ailing mother.

We know both of them pretty well and feel pretty sick about the whole thing.

My husband did suggest to the guy that it wasn't a very decent thing to do but it was brushed off as 'these things happen'.

I feel that we or I should at least alert the wife to what is going on.

My husband is not convinced and says we should mind our own business.

What do you all think?

Thanks for your column

Anonymous

Don’t you just hate these situations?

These ‘things' don’t just happen regardless of what your neighbour says.

He really is the scum of the earth and one can only hope the karma bus has his address.

I understand your husband’s caution; these situations can go very badly when you become the messenger of all things unsavoury.

I always try to put myself in the place of the victim here and think about what I would want to happen.

Therefore I think I would go out on a limb and ensure she knows.

Just be aware that you could be the worst person around after you have told her.

Only you can make that decision but I suggest you weigh up your options and find the one that you can live with.

The only other option I guess is that you with your husband tell your male neighbour that he should cease and desist or you will have no choice but to tell his wife.

Or perhaps you could confront the ‘other woman’ with the same scenario and see if she actually has any common decency.

This rarely works but it is an option.

Hope it works out okay in the end.

AA 

Boy oh boy, we don’t know!

He’ll probably get sprung anyway.